thought scrapbook

Sometimes, it would be great if I could copy myself so that myself could be in two places at once.

The song that will symbolise me forever leaving high school. That will symbolise that end of an era. The teachers played it during our last assembly, encouraging us to ‘set the world on fire’, the teachers finally admitted that the most important lessons aren’t learnt in the classroom, that high school isn’t the be all and end all, they told us not to follow the norm, not to be the average family living in a semi-detached house in Ealing with 2.4 kids- we should be the young people to change a generation- ‘to burn brighter than the sun.’

But I’m going to miss it so much. Miss it all. No matter how much I complained about the useless homework (or ‘prep’ work they began to call it), the pointless dramas, the tedious, monotonous routine, now that I’ve realised it’s all gone, I want it all back. I want to continue sitting in English lessons discussing running about fields and what it would feel like running into a haystack (as the deprived, city Londoners we are) instead of seriously discussing ‘Wuthering Heights’, to continue having ‘banter’ with the teachers, to continue calling my form tutor’s boyfriend Mr Tesco because he works there and continue demanding that she invite us all to her not-yet-planned wedding. I’m going to miss walking into assembly, and seeing a friend displaying their musical talent on stage and cheering them on, moshing whilst your friend’s band is playing on stage, always gathering as a big group in the exact same space in school, so much so that your gang is named after where they placed themselves. I’m going to miss that guy in my form who I probably won’t keep in contact with but always cheered me up in the morning by saying something stupid, going miss all the random jokes and stories, the guy who ‘stole’ milk, the annoying-ness of the song ‘Pocket Full of Sunshine’, sharing stories with your form tutor about how your friend passed out on the night bus home. I’m going to miss that absolutely lovely but crazy girl with the american accent who’s sentences were either ‘That’s beautiful’, ‘That’s amazing’ or ‘That’s horrible.’ That dopey guy who constantly looks confused, that guy who seems to know anything and everything, the girl who always pays you a compliment, that couple in the study centre (our version of a library) who seriously just need to get a room, that teacher who seems to spend most of his time buying the exact same suit when he goes shopping, the list goes on. 

Some people say that I shouldn’t be so upset, after all I haven’t been there for the whole era, I’ve moved high school three times. But in some ways it makes it sadder, I haven’t had time to get sick of the place, I don’t have the pictures and chartered memories to track my change, just a jumble of mixed up memories. Though I’m glad I moved in each case. This move though is completely different, and it’s so strange to accept that nothing will ever be the same again. I guess looking back I really did get involved in school and tried to make a legacy but I feel I could have done more. So my advice would be to completely go all out at high school, talk to everyone, try every activity available, because in the end you end up regretting the stuff you don’t do rather than the stuff you do do. 

I guess this has just turned into a rant about leaving high school, but I need to pour out all my emotion before I can sit down and watch the last episode of this season’s ‘Glee’ without getting teary eyed! Life is going past pretty fast. My brain can’t comprehend that come tomorrow I’m not going to school, and I’m never going to have another lesson again. That even come September, instead of starting a new school year, I’ll be packing to move to the other side of the country away from my friends, my family, life as I know it right now to completely start something new.

I guess all that’s left now is for me to have an awesome summer. Let’s look forward to the future. ‘Tonight we are young, so let’s set the world on fire, we can burn brighter than the sun.’

iheartclassics:

Need to earn £200 within the next two months… I have school exams and no job… any ideas? (sensible please!)